Thursday, July 26, 2012

Time to Sign


‘Our Father who is in heaven,
Hallowed be Your name.
‘ Your kingdom come.
Your will be done,
On earth as it is in heaven. 
Matthew 6:9
Facts and Figures
       When foster children are placed in adoptive homes, after rights have been terminated, and after the appeal period of 70 days without an appeal passes then, you can sign adoption papers. Here's why I like agencies to be involved, my agency was very careful when it came to signing adoption papers. Once adoption papers are signed you no longer get support from the agency meaning they don't come for visits anymore and won't be able to advocate for you. County sometimes will try and make you sign adoption papers before the 70 day waiting period is up but the rush could really get hopes high and if something goes wrong at this point it could get pretty messy.

   I've met many foster parents in passing who have gotten certified directly through Department of County and Family Services and from what I've gathered their process for foster care and then adoption is quite different. Through my agency I went through being approved for foster care and adoption at the same time which in the long run saves you time. Through the county you are only approved for foster care and then if you want to adopt you have to go through more paperwork at that point. Signing adoption papers means that you have now started the finalization process. It's truly amazing how much paperwork is involved but it's really worth it.

   At the time when you sign the paperwork you get every piece of paper that the county has on your child and birth family. Basically they hand you their entire file on every paper filled and every report written. The information you will find in there is birth family history, any found medical information, original birth certificate, birth records, and reports on case progress. There maybe information in there that wasn't originally stated by your county social worker for example, I didn't know that my daughter had a middle name. I had asked but the social worker had said there was none to be found. Because I renamed her I would have liked to know her middle name so as to consider it in her final legal name. At this point it was too late the new birth certificate paperwork was in the works and I wasn't allowed to add her middle name.

 Also going over the new stack of paperwork you will find out information on the birth parents that you didn't know about. This can help in putting together some of the pieces of the puzzle. It's hard to know what happened to your child before they came to you. If you are like me I wanted to know everything so I could get a picture of what she came out of to see if later in life any behaviors manifest. It's not guaranteed if you get a baby from the foster system that they won't come with behavior problems later. I believe it's important to be informed so that you can be prepared. Who knows whether it's nurture verses nature, I happen to believe it's both and you can give your child skills to combat their nature side if it's behaviors that are commonly seen in their birth family.

 If we are talking about it from a faith perspective we can see where coming into agreement with the wrong kingdom can bring curses that can manifest for generations to come. An example of this is Cain, he came into agreement with the wrong kingdom by killing his brother and he was cursed as well as his children and children's children. When we have children placed in our homes it's important to know past generational behaviors so that we can pray it through and see Jesus bring redemption. For every curse there's a blessing and when the curse is broken the blessings are released. "Where sin abound grace much more abounds," Romans 5:20. For some great information on this I recommend listening to Arthur Burk his series in redemptive gifts. I'll put the link below. We are people who are facing down the orphan spirit and saying that theses children are legitimate sons and daughters with all the rights and inheritances that birth children get so we must understand that when they are manifesting anger or fear that the love that we aim towards them will break the chains of injustice in their lives. Getting the whole picture is important and signing adoption papers is coming into agreement with the spirit of adoption which I believe is the heart of Father God.

website for Arthur Burk:

Thoughts and Journal Entries
April 2012 

    I can't believe it's finally here the step before the final step. As I was signing the adoption papers I kept thinking about how far we have come. The first time I saw my daughter so tiny and screaming, I had no idea what I was doing. I remember wondering why she was fine on one bottle and the other it seemed like she kept spitting it out a friend of mine said to me what flow level are you using for the nipple on the bottle, what's a flow level? So, many fast learning curves for me, I didn't have the 9 months of preparation though it did take me about 9 months to finish my certification. I don't even remember what she looked like or how tiny she was I just couldn't believe someone had given me a whole human being to take care of. Now it's finished, no more social worker (except county once a month till the adoption is finalized) no more reports or court hearings. It's almost surreal really thinking that it's almost done this journey that I started a year ago.

  In the paperwork that I got handed after signing I found out a lot about the birth parents and family I didn't know before it really helps me to know where she came from. I'm beyond overjoyed to be here in this moment knowing that there was no way that I have gotten here with out the favor of God. The day that I signed the adoption papers I called an attorney. I don't have the finances yet to hire one but I want this to be finished quickly so we can move back up north. The attorney never answered or called back but I know that it will all end soon I can feel it.

  The day after signing the adoption papers I went to my senior pastors wedding which I feel was a sign of the season shift. It was so far away that my phone stopped working I'm hoping that the attorney will leave me a message if she calls back.

  This month was full of fun moments, Easter, wedding, we went to the zoo for the first time, Bella's friend's first birthday, signing adoption papers, many beach days, my friend from England hung out with us and I did a random video shoot for our church. Who says life isn't full of adventure! I didn't get as much work as I was hoping for but I'm determined to get my book out and I'm hoping that filing taxes (though I have to extend them) will bring in some finances for us.

Fun story about Bella's Easter dress, I forgot I had a gift card to children's place from her birthday and so when it came time to buy her dress I didn't know how I was going to pay for it. Then I remembered I had the card and we went in and found an amazing dress, shoes, and hair band all at the perfect price. I even had 15$ left over on the card that I came back later to use because they had this crazy sale that if I spent a certain amount I would get a discount I ended up probably buying over a hundred dollars worth of clothing and only spending 15$ out of pocket. God is so amazing!

  Another quick story about the zoo, I had really been feeling like I wanted to take Bella to the zoo but it's kinda pricey, my friend heard I wanted to go and found us all tickets for so cheap. Every time I put something before the Lord He answers me. He doesn't just give us what we need He gives us the desires of our hearts! Even if we think it's the smallest thing He hears it and His desire is to give us everything we want and need because He's a good Father!
My Easter baby

Signing Papers!

Zoo time


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